As many marriages hit rough patches and finally end up in divorces, many factors are to be blamed. It could be a cheating partner, irreconcilable differences or money matters. Today we will talk about the money matters- mostly how to manage finances as a couple. Managing money as a couple is something so simple and manageable, and yet many couples fail at it.
There is no need for your blissful union to end up in a divorce lawyerâ€™s office because you failed to manage finances in your marriage. We are here to help you keep that flame burning, and living your life stress-free-financial wise. Without further ado, ladies, and gentlemen
The first step to managing your finances in a marriage is talking about it. This is actually best if you are yet to wed. When you start getting serious with each other try starting the conversation on money. The sooner the better. If you are already married though, it is not too late to start talking about it.
By talking about money, you will get to know how the other person spends their money. You will also get to learn more about their money management methods, and if you have the same view on money matters.
One thing to note though is how you talk about the money issue. You do not want to be in a conversation where one or the both of you are yelling at each other. Or a conversation where one of you feels targeted and not understood. The tone, in general, needs to be moderate, and you both need to listen and contribute to the conversation.
How can this be done? Here are a few Doâ€™s and Donâ€™ts:
Now that we have gone through the Doâ€™s and Donâ€™ts when talking about managing finances in your marriage, the next step is how to start the conversation. It could be a huge step to take especially if you are not talking about it already. Here are a few hints to get you started:
Once you have started the conversation and found ways to keep it going, it will be easy to know about your partnerâ€™s personality- money wise. This is our next step.
We all have different personalities when it comes to how we carry ourselves or how we relate with other people in various situations. We also have different personalities on matters of money. You could be a little bit of two or all personalities but there is, of course, the dominant one. Thatâ€™s the one to look out for.
This is the person that loves saving. Every cent has to be accounted for because it could have been used to do something better in the future.
They thrive on spending their money. Whether it is shopping, traveling, eating out or whatever it is. They derive their pleasure and happiness from spending their money whichever way they wish.
They avoid talking about money as much as possible. To them, talking about money is a burden or a petty subject. Getting them to talk about is like trying to move a mountain!
Just like the personality name, they will try everything possible to avoid talking about money. Yes, they can have that conversation but they do not want to have it. So, they will try to avoid it at all cost.
Our next step is learning about ways to manage finances in a marriage. The conversation does not end at knowing the conversation starters, the Doâ€™s and Donâ€™ts or each otherâ€™s personality. Actually, once you have passed all those steps, your next goal is knowing how to manage the finance.
This is where you both keep a joint account, and any money earned and spent in your home has to pass through that account. This means the income, savings and expenditureâ€™s accounts if owned, are also joint accounts.
There are actually numerous couples out here that have joint accounts, and it works great for them. To make it work;
In case you want to share responsibilities, and still, each of you gets to keep a part of their money, then a pooled account will come in hand. This is more of a compromise actually. Where you both contribute to the savings, income, and expenses kitty of your home, but still keep part of your income to yourselves.
Here are a few things to consider and talk about when having this kind of arrangement:
This is where the philosophy of â€śWhat is mine is mine, and what is your is yoursâ€ť applies. It is a nice philosophy to go by when you are starting to date. Unfortunately, it can be a thorn in your relationship when you move in together.
In such an arrangement, may be talking about how to treat each otherâ€™s properties. Well, because being in a situation where you are always reminded I bought the TV or the couch or the bed, and it is mine is not a way to live. However, it could be a good way to start to help you learn about each otherâ€™s money personalities.
The final step to managing finances in a marriage is coming up with a system and making it work. Whether you have chosen to have a joint account, a pooled account, or separate accounts you need to make it work.
You need to have a minimum amount that needs to be in your account. In case the amount drops below the agreed minimum level, you have to come up with ways to fill it up to the agreed amount or more.
Yes, you have a joint or a pooled account, and how to spend this money but have you discussed when you need to put money in the account? It is such an overlooked factor but it is one of the most important ones. This will depend on how often you are both paid.
Have a list of your expenses and bills to be paid as well as how often they occur. It will also be great to note down how often money comes in.
You both need to keep an open mind because things could change along the way and you do not want a fight to ensue. Talk about having an emergency account, and how to take care of unexpected finances.
In conclusion, talking about finances in a marriage is such an easy thing especially if you follow our guide. Start talking about finances as soon as possible, learn about each otherâ€™s money personalities and how to manage finances in your marriage. Agreeing on a system that suits the both of you will also go a long in keeping your union from financial fights.
Do you and your partner talk about managing your finances? Whatâ€™s your system like?